Black Sheep asks the age old question, what happens when a movie steals the name of a classic comedy and inserts two brothers, one with an irrational fear of sheep and another with an insatiable love of sheep? Keep in mind that these brothers are from New Zealand. The answer is one of the best new age horror movies I've seen since Zombie Strippers, and that's saying something. So this movie isn't on fearnet yet. But it will be soon, guaranteed. And if not, it's worth it to rent.
The story is basically that of Resident Evil, except instead of zombies, its sheep. The umbrella corporation is a farmer interested in genetic engineering, and the T-virus is I guess some virus that gets created when you splice human and sheep DNA? That part is unclear, but basic zombie rules apply to the sheep. They bite you, you become them. It’s a heart wrenching story because sheep are fucking precious, and a sheep smeared with blood grazing among scattered body parts is fantastic in every way.
Leave it to the Kiwis to show American B movie directors how it’s done. I know, crappy CGI that your brother-in-law learned at the academy of arts gives you a boner. That’s OK, but it doesn’t mean it belongs on the big screen. With mostly make-up, costumes, and a perfect amount of squirting blood Black Sheep gives CGI the finger and it really works. They needed to show a truck falling off a clip, so they actually pushed a truck off a cliff, how balled out is that? The icing on the cake is the shot at the end featuring a main characters penis, a la Sleepaway Camp. Imagine Stretch Armstrong’s penis in a tug of war contest. With a sheep’s teeth.
Margarets: 10 out of 10 for blood, easily.
Bernhardts: 5, it’s not really scary, but it did give me nightmares…
ChimpyChimps: 8, it starts out slow but then gets real funny real fast.
Hathaways: 2. Very little in the way of sex appeal in this one, unless your into sheep. But c’mon, they aren’t even shorn. Fag.
In conclusion, this movie is a serious winner in my book. Watch out for writer/director Jonathan King making some waves.
1 comment:
The Kiwis are renowned sheepfuckers, so it make sense they'd make a movie of they're greatest fear: The undying sheep that like the taste of dicks in their mouths.
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